THE NEED TO BELONG

"Children desperately want to belong. If they feel accepted, they maintain their courage and present few problems. They do what the situation requires and gets a sense of belonging through there usefulness and participation." - Floy Pepper

When children's belonging needs are met they are cooperative, well behaved, eager to learn and adventurous. On the other hand, when their belonging needs go unmet, children are troublesome, discouraged and mischievous. Their mischief and troublemaking is aimed at getting the attention they need but were unable to get through cooperative behavior.

Degradation or Acceptance

"Trying to be what you are not is degradation." -- Maxwell Maltz

The quickest and surest way to lower your self-esteem is to pretend to be someone you're not. Whenever you try to be someone different than who you are, you are secretly judging and finding fault with yourself. When you fail to accept your self the way you are, you are putting your self down. Self acceptance is an essential aspect of good self-esteem.

Be Willing To Have It So

"Be willing to have it so. Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune." - William James

Our children often have a melt-down when things don't go exactly the way they want or expect. When that happens, we have an opportunity to teach them the importance of acceptance. Too often I see parents miss this opportunity entirely. Instead, they bribe their child with promises in an effort to distract them from their disappointment. It is better to use patient conversation to guide them in the way of acceptance.

Enough

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow." -Melody Beattie

Melody Beattie speaks from experience and says it all. Gratitude is a powerful attitude changer that transforms ones life.

Acceptance

"Be willing to have it so. Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune." -- William James

This seems so obvious. What benefit could possibly come as a result of resisting reality? After all, you can go nowhere from where you are not. You can only move forward from the place your standing. To accept your misfortune is to stand on solid ground, the only meaningful starting place for a new tomorrow.

Meditations for Parents in recovery